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© 2025 Natalie Boese

ON WEDNESDAYS WE WEAR PINK. I know it’s super silly but when I dress in outfits that I like, I SWEAR I play better, run faster and just in general, have a better time. When I was a kid, I never wore pink, and I NEVER CRIED. Because that’s what weak girls do. 🙄  Well, things change. I now cry at McDonald’s commercials, I wear pink and celebrate it and I still show skin even when I don’t feel like I am physically at my best. It’s a heck of a lot more fun than waiting until I am at that “perfect weight again”.
So I wore this outfit this morning and it was really, really, hot out. And we won! I think it was because the skirt.

#OnWednesdaysWeWearPink #PickleballToronto #MeanGirls #AmandaSeyfried #visitFairgrounds #pickleballCanada #pickleballcommunity

ON WEDNESDAYS WE WEAR PINK. I know it’s super silly but when I dress in outfits that I like, I SWEAR I play better, run faster and just in general, have a better time. When I was a kid, I never wore pink, and I NEVER CRIED. Because that’s what weak girls do. 🙄  Well, things change. I now cry at McDonald’s commercials, I wear pink and celebrate it and I still show skin even when I don’t feel like I am physically at my best. It’s a heck of a lot more fun than waiting until I am at that “perfect weight again”.
So I wore this outfit this morning and it was really, really, hot out. And we won! I think it was because the skirt.

#OnWednesdaysWeWearPink #PickleballToronto #MeanGirls #AmandaSeyfried #visitFairgrounds #pickleballCanada #pickleballcommunity

The Days are Long but the Years are Short. Can you relate? You want them to grow and experience everything they should… or maybe life circumstances change in a way that breaks your heart. But you’ll never forget how it felt to be a new mother. This morning I clicked on, “Owen’s Delivery Playlist” a playlist I made to bring him into the world through energy filled music that I loved. It now reminds me of them both, but always brings tears to my eyes.

#universityofbritishcolumbia #kelownabc #collegemom #kcnq2 #epilepsysucks

The Days are Long but the Years are Short. Can you relate? You want them to grow and experience everything they should… or maybe life circumstances change in a way that breaks your heart. But you’ll never forget how it felt to be a new mother. This morning I clicked on, “Owen’s Delivery Playlist” a playlist I made to bring him into the world through energy filled music that I loved. It now reminds me of them both, but always brings tears to my eyes.

#universityofbritishcolumbia #kelownabc #collegemom #kcnq2 #epilepsysucks

DOES THIS KIND OF THING EVER HAPPEN TO YOU?
I get lost in the weeds all the time. I’m super productive but not always at what I intended to. 🤣 #AppleHomeKit #Nanoleaf #Gardeninthecity #outdoorlighting #distracted

DOES THIS KIND OF THING EVER HAPPEN TO YOU?
I get lost in the weeds all the time. I’m super productive but not always at what I intended to. 🤣 #AppleHomeKit #Nanoleaf #Gardeninthecity #outdoorlighting #distracted

His view —> My view
A very special Canada Day filled with new beginnings. 🇨🇦♥️🇨🇦

His view —> My view
A very special Canada Day filled with new beginnings. 🇨🇦♥️🇨🇦

It’s amazing something as simple as pickleball can completely change your state. ✨

It’s amazing something as simple as pickleball can completely change your state. ✨

Yep. Why I am selling my Dyson Airwrap.

Yep. Why I am selling my Dyson Airwrap.

It was an epic memory - Neil Young came to play at Owen’s former boarding school Lakefield College to raise money to maintain the Northcote Farm and preserve some 🇨🇦Canadian history.
I mowed the lawn every weekend listening to After the Gold Rush when I was 14 through 16 on my yellow Sony Walkman. I played Neil and CSNY to Owen in the womb and through to his delivery day.

I even met Mr. Young outside a pre-Grammy party in Beverly Hills, February 2011.

I was SO nervous but I thought I would never get a chance again. So I said, “Mr. Young…” I repeated it 3 times until he finally looked over at me. “Your music has been an inspiration to me for every chapter of my life.” He just growled and me and moved on.

As a fellow parent of a child with special needs (he has two boys with Cerebral Palsy) he done enough benefit concerts to make up for dashing this woman’s dream of meeting her hero.

We all have our strengths and I adore listening and singing along to his.

#NeilYoung #Solo #NorthcoteFarm #Lakefield

It was an epic memory - Neil Young came to play at Owen’s former boarding school Lakefield College to raise money to maintain the Northcote Farm and preserve some 🇨🇦Canadian history.
I mowed the lawn every weekend listening to After the Gold Rush when I was 14 through 16 on my yellow Sony Walkman. I played Neil and CSNY to Owen in the womb and through to his delivery day.

I even met Mr. Young outside a pre-Grammy party in Beverly Hills, February 2011.

I was SO nervous but I thought I would never get a chance again. So I said, “Mr. Young…” I repeated it 3 times until he finally looked over at me. “Your music has been an inspiration to me for every chapter of my life.” He just growled and me and moved on.

As a fellow parent of a child with special needs (he has two boys with Cerebral Palsy) he done enough benefit concerts to make up for dashing this woman’s dream of meeting her hero.

We all have our strengths and I adore listening and singing along to his.

#NeilYoung #Solo #NorthcoteFarm #Lakefield

In Toronto, it’s illegal to let your cats outdoors. True or False?
(And @elmcgrath this was just after you left today!)

In Toronto, it’s illegal to let your cats outdoors. True or False?
(And @elmcgrath this was just after you left today!)

When I use my favourite mug and I know she’s watching, I just feel a lot smarter throughout the day. 🤓 Ya know?

When I use my favourite mug and I know she’s watching, I just feel a lot smarter throughout the day. 🤓 Ya know?

💡I am in Marie Forleo’s Dream Club and a member asked, “Is there an easier software than either Excel or pen + paper that to could use to map out my businesses production process? I want my staff to easily enter it on my tablet.”

I don’t know a lot about this business, but I made this very simple Notion flow chart for them. When you open it, you can see it in table view, or you can flip to “Timeline View” which is their version of a Gantt chart.

Sometimes, basic is just what we need. What are you using Notion for? Do you find it simple or complex? (Ahem, asking for a friend.) 😳

💡I am in Marie Forleo’s Dream Club and a member asked, “Is there an easier software than either Excel or pen + paper that to could use to map out my businesses production process? I want my staff to easily enter it on my tablet.”

I don’t know a lot about this business, but I made this very simple Notion flow chart for them. When you open it, you can see it in table view, or you can flip to “Timeline View” which is their version of a Gantt chart.

Sometimes, basic is just what we need. What are you using Notion for? Do you find it simple or complex? (Ahem, asking for a friend.) 😳

🎾 Some of us sniff the balls when they open a can!! Who actually does that?? 😜

🎾 Some of us sniff the balls when they open a can!! Who actually does that?? 😜

👩🏼‍💻 Digital Decluttering TODAY at 12:30 PM EST / 9:30 AM PST

It’s a little last minute but I am inviting you to a FREE (normally paid - but for you it’s free!) event TODAY at 12:30 PM EST / 9:30 AM PST talk I am giving with the worldwide women’s group “On Friday” on Digital Decluttering Your Apple Tech.

Link is in my and the code is “NATALIEOF”

There is no recording, and I have just received the opportunity to share this with my network. I hope to see you there but if not, and you are interested in more, please reply and let me know!! And while this is just for women today, please share this with the women in your life who’d love community and digital decluttering!

On Friday is for women like us who are leading full lives, and who seek connection and learning. It’s resonating with women who are at a distinct place in their life and careers and are making a meaningful impact. Each Friday they curate expert speakers virtually who share their experience, wisdom and resources, to elevate women and to navigate life and work.

👩🏼‍💻 Digital Decluttering TODAY at 12:30 PM EST / 9:30 AM PST

👩🏼‍💻 Digital Decluttering TODAY at 12:30 PM EST / 9:30 AM PST

It’s a little last minute but I am inviting you to a FREE (normally paid - but for you it’s free!) event TODAY at 12:30 PM EST / 9:30 AM PST talk I am giving with the worldwide women’s group “On Friday” on Digital Decluttering Your Apple Tech.

Link is in my and the code is “NATALIEOF”

There is no recording, and I have just received the opportunity to share this with my network. I hope to see you there but if not, and you are interested in more, please reply and let me know!! And while this is just for women today, please share this with the women in your life who’d love community and digital decluttering!

On Friday is for women like us who are leading full lives, and who seek connection and learning. It’s resonating with women who are at a distinct place in their life and careers and are making a meaningful impact. Each Friday they curate expert speakers virtually who share their experience, wisdom and resources, to elevate women and to navigate life and work.

👩🏼‍💻 Digital Decluttering TODAY at 12:30 PM EST / 9:30 AM PST

One of the greatest St. Patricks day in memory! I got to spend it with the Leafs, @russellaxford and Leo. 🍀 I waved to @aliciamccarvell and she waved back as we were friends. What an absolute sweetheart she is! 🩷🩷

One of the greatest St. Patricks day in memory! I got to spend it with the Leafs, @russellaxford and Leo. 🍀 I waved to @aliciamccarvell and she waved back as we were friends. What an absolute sweetheart she is! 🩷🩷

💫 INBOX ZERO WIN!
Starting my Monday with just 48 emails across 4 accounts (only 17 unread)! Remember when Monday mornings meant drowning in hundreds of emails?
Not anymore! A clean inbox = clear mind = productive week ahead! 🎯
Want to know my secret system for keeping emails under control? Drop a ‘✨’ below!

#InboxZero #MondayMotivation #ProductivityHacks #OrganizedLife #macmadesimple#DigitalOrganization

💫 INBOX ZERO WIN!
Starting my Monday with just 48 emails across 4 accounts (only 17 unread)! Remember when Monday mornings meant drowning in hundreds of emails?
Not anymore! A clean inbox = clear mind = productive week ahead! 🎯
Want to know my secret system for keeping emails under control? Drop a ‘✨’ below!

#InboxZero #MondayMotivation #ProductivityHacks #OrganizedLife #macmadesimple#DigitalOrganization

CLOSING OFF 2024 ➡️ OPENING UP TO 2025 Since October when Rhys went into the hospital, I’ve only been able to think one day in advance.   I keep saying that major surgery post pandemic for your child has been like night and day compared to when we went through this in 2020. There were so many volunteers at the hospital, supportive and happy staff, and there were smiles that I was able to see with the masks off!

Earlier this year, I shared my story about our time in the hospital because I needed community. I appreciate all of you who reached out, who came to visit and those who made special gestures. 🩷 I appreciate you SO much. I really want to share the most beautiful incense dish that was hand crafted and gifted to me by Matt Chu @brushbymatt. Each time I hold that dish or inhale the scent of woodsy spice, I will think of all of the kindness shown to me and Rhys.  It wasn’t a breeze, Rhysie worked his little tail off but it was a journey with a happy ending. Here’s Owen escorting Rhys from the hospital this weekend and we were all smiles as we walked out that front door together.

#HB125 @HBKidsHospital #CerebralPalsyMom #KCNQ2 #LifewithRhys #AutismMom

CLOSING OFF 2024 ➡️ OPENING UP TO 2025 Since October when Rhys went into the hospital, I’ve only been able to think one day in advance.   I keep saying that major surgery post pandemic for your child has been like night and day compared to when we went through this in 2020. There were so many volunteers at the hospital, supportive and happy staff, and there were smiles that I was able to see with the masks off!

Earlier this year, I shared my story about our time in the hospital because I needed community. I appreciate all of you who reached out, who came to visit and those who made special gestures. 🩷 I appreciate you SO much. I really want to share the most beautiful incense dish that was hand crafted and gifted to me by Matt Chu @brushbymatt. Each time I hold that dish or inhale the scent of woodsy spice, I will think of all of the kindness shown to me and Rhys.  It wasn’t a breeze, Rhysie worked his little tail off but it was a journey with a happy ending. Here’s Owen escorting Rhys from the hospital this weekend and we were all smiles as we walked out that front door together.

#HB125 @HBKidsHospital #CerebralPalsyMom #KCNQ2 #LifewithRhys #AutismMom

The weekends at the hospital are so quiet. There is always a push pull in my heart to be here. When I am not here with Rhys I feel I should be and when I am - I long for a regular schedule (tick, tick tick off the list). Rhys’ discharge date will be January 3rd.  Currently, Rhys is asleep and I am trying to catch up on work and life in the lobby of @HBKidsHospital. Earlier today, I saw a boy move his electric wheelchair to wait by the front doors of the hospital, just looking out the window. I wondered what his life was like.

Then an hour later, I look up and I see 9 of his friends who all appear to be in grade 9 or 10, pose with him in front of the #HB125 sign. That lonely boy wasn’t so lonely anymore. And I was so happy for him that he had all those friends come and support him with a visit. I know his life isn’t going to be easy. But what I also know is that today he has peers who love him.
 Suddenly, with a quick inhale I was struck by the fact that Rhys has no friends. Not one his own age, and he never will. He is so adorable and eager to laugh - but he will never have that typical relationship that most of us take for granted as a child. Just one friend hangin’ out with another.

Crying in public isn’t my best look - but I wrote this post right here in front of the HB125 sign because I want to share our story.

I don’t want to feel alone and if there are others who are going through something remotely similar, I am sending you my love through the ethers. 🩷

The weekends at the hospital are so quiet. There is always a push pull in my heart to be here. When I am not here with Rhys I feel I should be and when I am - I long for a regular schedule (tick, tick tick off the list). Rhys’ discharge date will be January 3rd.  Currently, Rhys is asleep and I am trying to catch up on work and life in the lobby of @HBKidsHospital. Earlier today, I saw a boy move his electric wheelchair to wait by the front doors of the hospital, just looking out the window. I wondered what his life was like.

Then an hour later, I look up and I see 9 of his friends who all appear to be in grade 9 or 10, pose with him in front of the #HB125 sign. That lonely boy wasn’t so lonely anymore. And I was so happy for him that he had all those friends come and support him with a visit. I know his life isn’t going to be easy. But what I also know is that today he has peers who love him.
 Suddenly, with a quick inhale I was struck by the fact that Rhys has no friends. Not one his own age, and he never will. He is so adorable and eager to laugh - but he will never have that typical relationship that most of us take for granted as a child. Just one friend hangin’ out with another.

Crying in public isn’t my best look - but I wrote this post right here in front of the HB125 sign because I want to share our story.

I don’t want to feel alone and if there are others who are going through something remotely similar, I am sending you my love through the ethers. 🩷

THIS IS 15.
White picket fence, perfect marriage, perfect job, perfect body. This is not that.
Actually, this video is life, and today, I’m here for it. 🥰

#LifeWithRhysie #AutismMum #CerebralpalsyKids #KCNQ2 #SliceOfLife #electrictoothbrush

THIS IS 15.
White picket fence, perfect marriage, perfect job, perfect body. This is not that.
Actually, this video is life, and today, I’m here for it. 🥰

#LifeWithRhysie #AutismMum #CerebralpalsyKids #KCNQ2 #SliceOfLife #electrictoothbrush

WHAT WOUKD YOU HAVE DONE?🤔
I went from overtired, to cheering myself up and buying my son an impromptu gift, to feeling dejected. How many minutes do I give myself to feel badly about this?
(Answer: I feel way better already!)

#lifechoices #starbucksorder #benice

WHAT WOUKD YOU HAVE DONE?🤔
I went from overtired, to cheering myself up and buying my son an impromptu gift, to feeling dejected. How many minutes do I give myself to feel badly about this?
(Answer: I feel way better already!)

#lifechoices #starbucksorder #benice

He’s on a roll 😜and doing better! Rhys’ planned 8 hour surgery went almost 12 hours but now that the shock of the day (and days following) have passed, we are settling into our new routine at @hollandbloorview Kids Rehab hospital. It all went well, I’m exhaling a sigh of relief.
#specialneedsmama #KCNQ2 #LifewithRhys #KCNQ2strong #cerebralpalsymom #congenitalhipdysplasia

He’s on a roll 😜and doing better! Rhys’ planned 8 hour surgery went almost 12 hours but now that the shock of the day (and days following) have passed, we are settling into our new routine at @hollandbloorview Kids Rehab hospital. It all went well, I’m exhaling a sigh of relief.
#specialneedsmama #KCNQ2 #LifewithRhys #KCNQ2strong #cerebralpalsymom #congenitalhipdysplasia

THE IRONY isn’t lost on me—I find myself back at SickKids this week, reliving echoes of the experience that inspired my latest book.

This new chapter shares the story of my son Rhys and our family’s 3-month hospital journey in 2020, a time that truly brought me to my knees.

In writing this book, I wanted to share the tools that helped me rediscover who I was before life became overwhelming.

Being a parent to a child with special needs can feel isolating, and my hope is that this story brings comfort and connection, whether or not you’re a parent navigating similar challenges.

I’m thrilled to share Your Highest Self, releasing on November 8th! It’ll be available at Indigo, Barnes & Noble, and yes—Amazon. But for those who purchase through my website (link in bio), the first 5 will receive a signed copy of one of my other books as a gift, and the first 25 will also get access to a recorded Hypnobreathwork® session, the very tool that transformed my life.

I can’t wait to share this journey with you. 🩷

Publisher @fempower.pub + @thesabrinagreer @mamasandco
@liannekimcoach

#LifewithRhys #KCNQ2 #AutismMom #CerebralPalsyMom #WomenInBusiness #AdvocateForSpecialNeeds #ParentingWithPurpose #CanadianMom #AuthorOfInstagram #CanadianAuthors

THE IRONY isn’t lost on me—I find myself back at SickKids this week, reliving echoes of the experience that inspired my latest book.

This new chapter shares the story of my son Rhys and our family’s 3-month hospital journey in 2020, a time that truly brought me to my knees.

In writing this book, I wanted to share the tools that helped me rediscover who I was before life became overwhelming.

Being a parent to a child with special needs can feel isolating, and my hope is that this story brings comfort and connection, whether or not you’re a parent navigating similar challenges.

I’m thrilled to share Your Highest Self, releasing on November 8th! It’ll be available at Indigo, Barnes & Noble, and yes—Amazon. But for those who purchase through my website (link in bio), the first 5 will receive a signed copy of one of my other books as a gift, and the first 25 will also get access to a recorded Hypnobreathwork® session, the very tool that transformed my life.

I can’t wait to share this journey with you. 🩷

Publisher @fempower.pub + @thesabrinagreer @mamasandco
@liannekimcoach

#LifewithRhys #KCNQ2 #AutismMom #CerebralPalsyMom #WomenInBusiness #AdvocateForSpecialNeeds #ParentingWithPurpose #CanadianMom #AuthorOfInstagram #CanadianAuthors

AT THE END OF THE DAY, WE ARE ALONE.
Alone with Everybody.
Oct 3, 2004 —> Oct 3, 2024 

I’m always floored at how music marks the passage of time and takes you back in an instant. On October 3, 2024, an extraordinarily warm fall night we walked up Yonge Street past a condo that housed the spot where the stank watering hole The Morrissey used to be. I was thinking about how much free time I had was when I was 17. I’d drive into Toronto from Oakville to the Mo, likely to meet a boy whose last name I will never remember, but do recall asking him to take off his cowboy boots in a dirty bar just to see if I they might look better on me.

Fast forward 24 years to 2004 and I am walking through Manhattan, alone. Day after day, wandering through the city on my way to the Apple Store. I’d spend days there in their theatre, listening, learning and watching the celebrities get their iBooks checked out by the guys at the Genius Bar. Since it was the only Apple Store in the city, stars came in daily. I was absolutely in my element.

As I wandered home, zig zagging from the lower West Side back up to Union Square I was listening to a lot of Canadian bands like Broken Social Scene, Feist, The Organ, Stars, Sam Roberts, Metric and when I saw Arcade Fire in the window of Road Runner records I was so proud. I thought, “Oh that’s so exciting! They know about Canadian Indie music here.” Little did I know how big that Arcade Fire was going to be.  Some bands become huge and some bands become cult classics - like Stars, my favourite Canadian band of all time. I feel like Amy and Torquil and the guys are my friends and they’ve been with me through every tough and also the best moments of the last 20 years since “Set Yourself On Fire” was released. From New York City, to running along the St. Lawrence River in Montreal, back to Toronto in the Masonic Temple to celebrate the 20th Anniversary of Set Yourself on Fire - Stars have been with me in my ears and heart. 
I ran by myself then- but if you are comfortable with yourself you are never really alone.  #torontomusicscene #montrealstars

AT THE END OF THE DAY, WE ARE ALONE.
Alone with Everybody.
Oct 3, 2004 —> Oct 3, 2024 

I’m always floored at how music marks the passage of time and takes you back in an instant. On October 3, 2024, an extraordinarily warm fall night we walked up Yonge Street past a condo that housed the spot where the stank watering hole The Morrissey used to be. I was thinking about how much free time I had was when I was 17. I’d drive into Toronto from Oakville to the Mo, likely to meet a boy whose last name I will never remember, but do recall asking him to take off his cowboy boots in a dirty bar just to see if I they might look better on me.

Fast forward 24 years to 2004 and I am walking through Manhattan, alone. Day after day, wandering through the city on my way to the Apple Store. I’d spend days there in their theatre, listening, learning and watching the celebrities get their iBooks checked out by the guys at the Genius Bar. Since it was the only Apple Store in the city, stars came in daily. I was absolutely in my element.

As I wandered home, zig zagging from the lower West Side back up to Union Square I was listening to a lot of Canadian bands like Broken Social Scene, Feist, The Organ, Stars, Sam Roberts, Metric and when I saw Arcade Fire in the window of Road Runner records I was so proud. I thought, “Oh that’s so exciting! They know about Canadian Indie music here.” Little did I know how big that Arcade Fire was going to be.  Some bands become huge and some bands become cult classics - like Stars, my favourite Canadian band of all time. I feel like Amy and Torquil and the guys are my friends and they’ve been with me through every tough and also the best moments of the last 20 years since “Set Yourself On Fire” was released. From New York City, to running along the St. Lawrence River in Montreal, back to Toronto in the Masonic Temple to celebrate the 20th Anniversary of Set Yourself on Fire - Stars have been with me in my ears and heart. 
I ran by myself then- but if you are comfortable with yourself you are never really alone.  #torontomusicscene #montrealstars

I knew Rhys’ surgery was coming and so I jammed in as much as I could before Oct 29th. It was a little like the nesting you do before having a baby, you know?

Anyway, four girls who’ve known each other over 35 years piled into my car. The laughing, my distracted driving and DJ Jazzy Jeff coincidentally came on - it felt like the ‘90’s all over again. Except for one thing, I will NEVER ride in the trunk just to get a ride somewhere ever again! 🤦🏼‍♀️

I knew Rhys’ surgery was coming and so I jammed in as much as I could before Oct 29th. It was a little like the nesting you do before having a baby, you know?

Anyway, four girls who’ve known each other over 35 years piled into my car. The laughing, my distracted driving and DJ Jazzy Jeff coincidentally came on - it felt like the ‘90’s all over again. Except for one thing, I will NEVER ride in the trunk just to get a ride somewhere ever again! 🤦🏼‍♀️

🎃It’s scary, but it’s not because today is Halloween.
 I am super grateful to not hand out candy this year and to be at SickKids with Rhys. When I am here I feel helpful. When I am at home, I am either with Rhys wishing he were like the other kids, thinking that there must have been more that I can do to make him feel more included.

However, as I write that out, even just sharing that, it confirms my story about pain. And I don’t want that anymore.

What if I were to do things differently and didn’t put so much emphasis on societal markers like prom photos, first day photos or Halloween photos and I celebrated the small wins? What if I were to focus on what’s working versus what’s not?

So let’s start here. I am grateful that:
✅ Rhys came through his surgery alive (yes, in the back of my mind I wasn’t sure he was strong enough to get through 12 hours under general anesthesia, however misguided I might have been).
✅ He was able to have this surgery since I had been lobbying for it since 2020 when he had his first major surgery and they couldn’t get the OR time during the summer of 2020
✅ This hospital feels like a cake walk compared to the first time when we we were hospitalized for 3 months during the height of the pandemic.  So heck ya! And one more, I will be grateful for this fever that hasn’t broken because it’s fighting off the bad guys. 🦠

#specialneedsmama #KCNQ2 #lifeiwthRhys #specialneedsmom #kcnq2strong #cerebralpalsy

🎃It’s scary, but it’s not because today is Halloween.
 I am super grateful to not hand out candy this year and to be at SickKids with Rhys. When I am here I feel helpful. When I am at home, I am either with Rhys wishing he were like the other kids, thinking that there must have been more that I can do to make him feel more included.

However, as I write that out, even just sharing that, it confirms my story about pain. And I don’t want that anymore.

What if I were to do things differently and didn’t put so much emphasis on societal markers like prom photos, first day photos or Halloween photos and I celebrated the small wins? What if I were to focus on what’s working versus what’s not?

So let’s start here. I am grateful that:
✅ Rhys came through his surgery alive (yes, in the back of my mind I wasn’t sure he was strong enough to get through 12 hours under general anesthesia, however misguided I might have been).
✅ He was able to have this surgery since I had been lobbying for it since 2020 when he had his first major surgery and they couldn’t get the OR time during the summer of 2020
✅ This hospital feels like a cake walk compared to the first time when we we were hospitalized for 3 months during the height of the pandemic.  So heck ya! And one more, I will be grateful for this fever that hasn’t broken because it’s fighting off the bad guys. 🦠

#specialneedsmama #KCNQ2 #lifeiwthRhys #specialneedsmom #kcnq2strong #cerebralpalsy

Because you can’t fill from an empty cup.

Because you can’t fill from an empty cup.

As a 15+ year veteran mum at SickKids hospital, I thought I knew how to handle today. But I don’t know how I am supposed to feel. Or what I am allowed to feel. I feel incredibly selfish talking about my own thoughts when there is a small fry currently on the operating table and I’m over here, trying to process my feelings so that I can come back stronger. I just know I don’t want to do this alone in my own head anymore.

As a 15+ year veteran mum at SickKids hospital, I thought I knew how to handle today. But I don’t know how I am supposed to feel. Or what I am allowed to feel. I feel incredibly selfish talking about my own thoughts when there is a small fry currently on the operating table and I’m over here, trying to process my feelings so that I can come back stronger. I just know I don’t want to do this alone in my own head anymore.

POWER.

I lost myself somewhere along the way. I used to write all the thoughts that I had, either through social media or journaling. I was letting myself actually feel when I wrote. I felt so free.

But that feeling of freedom was only when I wrote. Because at night when the time was still I knew the pain would creep in. I would do whatever I could to avoid it and not feel. Not deal. Not acknowledge that everything felt so limited.

During the days, the time was filled with appointments - and car rides were filled with phone calls with friends. I never sat and thought and grieved. I knew I longed for something that was missing, that perfect life. The one with two healthy boys and a perfect marriage.

But then, I stopped writing, and whenever I was alone, (which was rare) I would either walk, or run. Sometimes I ran two times a day, just to avoid. It gave me that dopamine hit that I was lacking. And it stopped the sadness from creeping in.

But then in 2020 Rhys went in for extensive surgery and was in the hospital from end of June to mid September. Here was a child in casts from his hips to his toes. When I came home from the hospital I ran. I thought that I was keeping myself in shape - and in a form, I was. But then I felt a small pain in the back of my calf- and I knew I had to stop and to carefully hop-walk home. Like everything else, I pushed the pain to the back. It grew worse and worse, and then my focus switched to Rhys 100% of the time and running became a thing of the past.

I lost my way. Eventually, Rhys healed and came out of the hospital and eventually we came out of the pandemic. Here we are four years later and Rhys is due for another major reconstructive surgery.

Will he be ok? My little smurfie is 15 and still so little, with the height and weight of a slight 11 year old. The surgery involves cutting the thighbone (femur) and re-positioning the ball of the femur in the hip socket - and so much more.

Ahh. I know this will be painful. I share this with you because I want to do things differently this time. I don’t have an agenda and I am not looking for attention. I just want to write it down.

Wish us luck, we’re here for round two.

POWER.

I lost myself somewhere along the way. I used to write all the thoughts that I had, either through social media or journaling. I was letting myself actually feel when I wrote. I felt so free.

But that feeling of freedom was only when I wrote. Because at night when the time was still I knew the pain would creep in. I would do whatever I could to avoid it and not feel. Not deal. Not acknowledge that everything felt so limited.

During the days, the time was filled with appointments - and car rides were filled with phone calls with friends. I never sat and thought and grieved. I knew I longed for something that was missing, that perfect life. The one with two healthy boys and a perfect marriage.

But then, I stopped writing, and whenever I was alone, (which was rare) I would either walk, or run. Sometimes I ran two times a day, just to avoid. It gave me that dopamine hit that I was lacking. And it stopped the sadness from creeping in.

But then in 2020 Rhys went in for extensive surgery and was in the hospital from end of June to mid September. Here was a child in casts from his hips to his toes. When I came home from the hospital I ran. I thought that I was keeping myself in shape - and in a form, I was. But then I felt a small pain in the back of my calf- and I knew I had to stop and to carefully hop-walk home. Like everything else, I pushed the pain to the back. It grew worse and worse, and then my focus switched to Rhys 100% of the time and running became a thing of the past.

I lost my way. Eventually, Rhys healed and came out of the hospital and eventually we came out of the pandemic. Here we are four years later and Rhys is due for another major reconstructive surgery.

Will he be ok? My little smurfie is 15 and still so little, with the height and weight of a slight 11 year old. The surgery involves cutting the thighbone (femur) and re-positioning the ball of the femur in the hip socket - and so much more.

Ahh. I know this will be painful. I share this with you because I want to do things differently this time. I don’t have an agenda and I am not looking for attention. I just want to write it down.

Wish us luck, we’re here for round two.

Sorority Rivalry

I met her in the fall of 1993 - she was a Gamma and I was a Pi Phi. To say she was intimidating was an understatement. Beauty, brains and a Toronto Marathon WINNER. She made life look easy. So I kept my distance. We have a ton of mutual friends - but never really spoke. It wasn’t until about ten years ago when I started posting about my journey with single motherhood and life with a special needs child that we connected. She was kind and would send me really nice, supportive messages. We were friends, from afar.

Then I launched my first attempt at a digital organization course and she was one of the first to buy. I was so grateful for the support. And while not everything turned out the way I had hoped, I made sure that each of my clients received value.   I kept reaching out to her asking if now was the time for me to help her get organized and more familiar with how to best use her Mac - and like most - it was never the highest priority in the moment. Time slipped by and she moved from Toronto to Kelowna, BC. Fast forward a year, and I’m here in her beautiful home getting all of her documents into tidy folders.

What I’ve learned from this friendship and client relationship is that we all have our strengths. I am never going to be a marathon winner but I CAN help my clients make their computers run faster and save them more time then ever before. And we are having a hell of a fun time doing it. 🩶🩷

#digitalorganization #macmadesimple

Sorority Rivalry

I met her in the fall of 1993 - she was a Gamma and I was a Pi Phi. To say she was intimidating was an understatement. Beauty, brains and a Toronto Marathon WINNER. She made life look easy. So I kept my distance. We have a ton of mutual friends - but never really spoke. It wasn’t until about ten years ago when I started posting about my journey with single motherhood and life with a special needs child that we connected. She was kind and would send me really nice, supportive messages. We were friends, from afar.

Then I launched my first attempt at a digital organization course and she was one of the first to buy. I was so grateful for the support. And while not everything turned out the way I had hoped, I made sure that each of my clients received value.   I kept reaching out to her asking if now was the time for me to help her get organized and more familiar with how to best use her Mac - and like most - it was never the highest priority in the moment. Time slipped by and she moved from Toronto to Kelowna, BC. Fast forward a year, and I’m here in her beautiful home getting all of her documents into tidy folders.

What I’ve learned from this friendship and client relationship is that we all have our strengths. I am never going to be a marathon winner but I CAN help my clients make their computers run faster and save them more time then ever before. And we are having a hell of a fun time doing it. 🩶🩷

#digitalorganization #macmadesimple

I could look at these two and feel threatened that their businesses might be further along than me, thinner than me or they may be younger than me.

Or - I can see what I can learn from them and see how I can support them.
You can do it alone, but why would you want to?

Year after year, I keep showing up for me and my business. I believed in my mission until I found others who believe in me too. And as a result, I had three nights with these two roomies filled with laughs and outfit changes and inspiration.

We aren’t the same, but put three blondes in front of a fan, and this is what you get. Birds of a feather, we should stick together.

🩷 Love you two.
@tait_consulting @_rachelwoodward_

#digitialorganization #digitalsystems #organizeyourlife #photoorganization #digitalphotos

I could look at these two and feel threatened that their businesses might be further along than me, thinner than me or they may be younger than me.

Or - I can see what I can learn from them and see how I can support them.
You can do it alone, but why would you want to?

Year after year, I keep showing up for me and my business. I believed in my mission until I found others who believe in me too. And as a result, I had three nights with these two roomies filled with laughs and outfit changes and inspiration.

We aren’t the same, but put three blondes in front of a fan, and this is what you get. Birds of a feather, we should stick together.

🩷 Love you two.
@tait_consulting @_rachelwoodward_

#digitialorganization #digitalsystems #organizeyourlife #photoorganization #digitalphotos

What a way to CELEBRATE! O and I are on a trip across the pond 🧀 to commemorate his high school graduation and he found out now that he’s been accepted at UBC Okanagan’s Management program. He’s going to get that wilderness life he’s been longing for. I’m just hoping he will come back home to Ontario and visit his Mumma after he’s finished. 🥲 I’m so proud of you Owen and the big guy you are becoming. And so is your little brother Rhysie. 💕

#AppleStoreLondon #AppleStore #KnightsBridge #UNCOkanagan #UBC #UBCVancouver #collegeacceptance #universityapplication

What a way to CELEBRATE! O and I are on a trip across the pond 🧀 to commemorate his high school graduation and he found out now that he’s been accepted at UBC Okanagan’s Management program. He’s going to get that wilderness life he’s been longing for. I’m just hoping he will come back home to Ontario and visit his Mumma after he’s finished. 🥲 I’m so proud of you Owen and the big guy you are becoming. And so is your little brother Rhysie. 💕

#AppleStoreLondon #AppleStore #KnightsBridge #UNCOkanagan #UBC #UBCVancouver #collegeacceptance #universityapplication

Words of Love.🩷
If only I could hear him say the words this Mother’s Day.
I may not be able to hear him say them, but I feel them.
I love you too Rhysie, you and your big brother.

Words of Love.🩷
If only I could hear him say the words this Mother’s Day.
I may not be able to hear him say them, but I feel them.
I love you too Rhysie, you and your big brother.

Little moments

For those of you who don’t know me well, this is my mother Koidula. She goes by Kit, an adopted name when she escaped from 🇪🇪 Estonia to 🇨🇦Canada during the Russian occupation. She is an incredible mum and when I think back on her life, she’s had a lot of adversity to overcome and became a great example for me. What I love so much is her zest for learning and her love. She is really knowledgeable when it comes to sports, history, politics, geography and languages in a way I can only wish I could be.   The other reason why I admire her so was her love for my boys. 🩷 Right from the beginning when we knew Rhys would have serious complications, she loved him so. There were moments in the hospital that I wasn’t sure I was up for this enormous journey, but she was there. She wasn’t there to actually DO my job, or take on my role as a mother of a child with severe special needs, but she gave me the lift that I needed to keep going.  So here she is, celebrating Mother’s Day with me a week early, chilling with Rhys and telling him all about how Swiatek, the Polish player overcomes Sabalenka, a Russian player in the Madrid Open Tennis Finals. His eye hand coordination might be off, but I am sure given the opportunity, she believes he would enjoy tennis. 😁🎾

Little moments

For those of you who don’t know me well, this is my mother Koidula. She goes by Kit, an adopted name when she escaped from 🇪🇪 Estonia to 🇨🇦Canada during the Russian occupation. She is an incredible mum and when I think back on her life, she’s had a lot of adversity to overcome and became a great example for me. What I love so much is her zest for learning and her love. She is really knowledgeable when it comes to sports, history, politics, geography and languages in a way I can only wish I could be.   The other reason why I admire her so was her love for my boys. 🩷 Right from the beginning when we knew Rhys would have serious complications, she loved him so. There were moments in the hospital that I wasn’t sure I was up for this enormous journey, but she was there. She wasn’t there to actually DO my job, or take on my role as a mother of a child with severe special needs, but she gave me the lift that I needed to keep going.  So here she is, celebrating Mother’s Day with me a week early, chilling with Rhys and telling him all about how Swiatek, the Polish player overcomes Sabalenka, a Russian player in the Madrid Open Tennis Finals. His eye hand coordination might be off, but I am sure given the opportunity, she believes he would enjoy tennis. 😁🎾

I’m just feeling really fortunate lately. I’ve been working hard behind the scenes, pulling my life back together after a few hard years in a row.

I was working out early this morning after getting up at 5:30 am to walk Indie on his 3rd birthday to make it in time to arrive at the chiropractor at 7am to help with my hips/knees/achilles (insert any pains here). By 8 am I’m working on dead lifts, bicep curls and Arnold presses. I’m focused on getting stronger but still making polite conversation with my trainer.

I mentioned I’m taking Rhys to clinic this week to discuss his upcoming hip surgery. It was supposed to happen when he had his bilateral leg extension + fundoplication + GTube surgery in 2020 but there wasn’t enough OR time available then to do all four.

My trainer kindly asked me what kind of therapy Rhys was receiving. Are his legs being moved back and forth?

I said they weren’t and that he was using his stander, his walker and stretching but… he… um, no. No he wasn’t receiving any more direct therapy. I tried to explain that there was a time when I was taking Rhys to PT three times a week and I had tried everything, in addition to PT. MEDEK, Reike, quantum touch, cranial sacral therapy…. But no, I wasn’t doing patterning at this point.

Instantly I started to cry, mid-repetition. Even when you finally get to a moment in your life that things are starting to feel better, you remember you can always do more. Or worse, could have done more. I just always feel so guilty, no matter where I am.

I drove Owen back to school on Monday after celebrating my dad’s 85th, instead of letting him take the previously paid for bus to Lakefield. I wanted alone time to talk. Even though when it’s my turn to speak Owen slowly turns up the volume of the playlist while I’m talking. 🙄 Hmmm. Parenting. 😐

And so I stayed quiet and let him listen while Dolores O’Riordan sings. “You got me wrapped around your finger.”

They do. All of them. But especially my little smurfies. No matter the challenges or the emotions, I am feeling fortunate today.

I’m just feeling really fortunate lately. I’ve been working hard behind the scenes, pulling my life back together after a few hard years in a row.

I was working out early this morning after getting up at 5:30 am to walk Indie on his 3rd birthday to make it in time to arrive at the chiropractor at 7am to help with my hips/knees/achilles (insert any pains here). By 8 am I’m working on dead lifts, bicep curls and Arnold presses. I’m focused on getting stronger but still making polite conversation with my trainer.

I mentioned I’m taking Rhys to clinic this week to discuss his upcoming hip surgery. It was supposed to happen when he had his bilateral leg extension + fundoplication + GTube surgery in 2020 but there wasn’t enough OR time available then to do all four.

My trainer kindly asked me what kind of therapy Rhys was receiving. Are his legs being moved back and forth?

I said they weren’t and that he was using his stander, his walker and stretching but… he… um, no. No he wasn’t receiving any more direct therapy. I tried to explain that there was a time when I was taking Rhys to PT three times a week and I had tried everything, in addition to PT. MEDEK, Reike, quantum touch, cranial sacral therapy…. But no, I wasn’t doing patterning at this point.

Instantly I started to cry, mid-repetition. Even when you finally get to a moment in your life that things are starting to feel better, you remember you can always do more. Or worse, could have done more. I just always feel so guilty, no matter where I am.

I drove Owen back to school on Monday after celebrating my dad’s 85th, instead of letting him take the previously paid for bus to Lakefield. I wanted alone time to talk. Even though when it’s my turn to speak Owen slowly turns up the volume of the playlist while I’m talking. 🙄 Hmmm. Parenting. 😐

And so I stayed quiet and let him listen while Dolores O’Riordan sings. “You got me wrapped around your finger.”

They do. All of them. But especially my little smurfies. No matter the challenges or the emotions, I am feeling fortunate today.

Do. It. Do. It. Do. It.
No.
Yes.
No.
I am afraid of heights, there is no way I am actually going to do it. I think.
But what I *did* do was become a published author again!!  I am a co-author of “Taking The Plunge” which has allowed me to surround myself with women from all over and has been undeniably life-changing!   Today is the release of this book, and to celebrate, we are giving away free copies of the book and the authors are inviting our communities to a FREE TEDx-style virtual summit packed with empowerment, strategy, and women supporting women! 
It’s all going down on April 9, 1 pm-5 pm EST via zoom… and it’s absolutely FREE.
We’re covering topics including…
* Digital Organization tips 🤓
* The Power of Impact: PR’s Role in Defining Your Purposeful Path
* Entrepreneurship as a multi-dimensional woman
* Overcoming the Social Media Noise: 30k Email Subscribers from 3 Reels
* Postpartum Depletion vs Postpartum Depression, understanding why your brain feels like it does. 
….but I am not giving it justice. Seriously. The women that are presenting are the type of women who you just want to get to know better (and find out all their secrets).  You know where to find the link to the FREE BOOK and also the FREE VIRTUAL SUMMIT (hint, hint, it’s near my name ⬆️)

Do. It. Do. It. Do. It.
No.
Yes.
No.
I am afraid of heights, there is no way I am actually going to do it. I think.
But what I *did* do was become a published author again!!  I am a co-author of “Taking The Plunge” which has allowed me to surround myself with women from all over and has been undeniably life-changing!   Today is the release of this book, and to celebrate, we are giving away free copies of the book and the authors are inviting our communities to a FREE TEDx-style virtual summit packed with empowerment, strategy, and women supporting women! 
It’s all going down on April 9, 1 pm-5 pm EST via zoom… and it’s absolutely FREE.
We’re covering topics including…
* Digital Organization tips 🤓
* The Power of Impact: PR’s Role in Defining Your Purposeful Path
* Entrepreneurship as a multi-dimensional woman
* Overcoming the Social Media Noise: 30k Email Subscribers from 3 Reels
* Postpartum Depletion vs Postpartum Depression, understanding why your brain feels like it does. 
….but I am not giving it justice. Seriously. The women that are presenting are the type of women who you just want to get to know better (and find out all their secrets).  You know where to find the link to the FREE BOOK and also the FREE VIRTUAL SUMMIT (hint, hint, it’s near my name ⬆️)

❓Call me old school but if we want to know the name of a band do we always have to read the screen in our car or iPhone?
#hangtheDJ #IYKYK #indiemusic #homepodmini #canadianindie #altnation @thebeachesband #thejunos

❓Call me old school but if we want to know the name of a band do we always have to read the screen in our car or iPhone?
#hangtheDJ #IYKYK #indiemusic #homepodmini #canadianindie #altnation @thebeachesband #thejunos

🌎 The last day before the world shut down was the last time I held a tennis racquet. Then when Rhys was in the hospital with full leg cast that first spring I tore my Achilles tendon. A slow, growing tear. It wasn’t treated and it got worse. Then I tore my psoas muscle carrying Rhys up and down the stairs. Eventually I couldn’t stand properly and couldn’t even walk anymore. Fast forward 4 years, 14 weeks in a cast and three rounds of PRP involving 40 needles in my tendon three times… I am finally healing, walking and now holding a racquet.
It may not be tennis yet but it’s PICKLEBALL and I feel human again. 😊
So what camp are you in? Tennis 🎾 or 🥒 Pickleball?

🌎 The last day before the world shut down was the last time I held a tennis racquet. Then when Rhys was in the hospital with full leg cast that first spring I tore my Achilles tendon. A slow, growing tear. It wasn’t treated and it got worse. Then I tore my psoas muscle carrying Rhys up and down the stairs. Eventually I couldn’t stand properly and couldn’t even walk anymore. Fast forward 4 years, 14 weeks in a cast and three rounds of PRP involving 40 needles in my tendon three times… I am finally healing, walking and now holding a racquet.
It may not be tennis yet but it’s PICKLEBALL and I feel human again. 😊
So what camp are you in? Tennis 🎾 or 🥒 Pickleball?

My little smurfie is all grown up (mostly). He’s gone from going with me to visit my sister in LA to visiting her without me. 😢
They were kind enough to send me photos of them in the Apple Store in the Grove, together, without me!! Honestly, I’m not sure who I miss the most; Karynne, Owen or The Gove LA Apple Store! Kidding. It’s obvious which one I missed the most. Right? 📲👩🏼‍💻

@thegrovela @karynneboese @owenmcintyre__ #thegroveLA

My little smurfie is all grown up (mostly). He’s gone from going with me to visit my sister in LA to visiting her without me. 😢
They were kind enough to send me photos of them in the Apple Store in the Grove, together, without me!! Honestly, I’m not sure who I miss the most; Karynne, Owen or The Gove LA Apple Store! Kidding. It’s obvious which one I missed the most. Right? 📲👩🏼‍💻

@thegrovela @karynneboese @owenmcintyre__ #thegroveLA

Happy Birthday to my beautiful and dear friend Karen! On one hand, I can’t believe we so grown up and on the other, I think you were always the incredible woman that you are now… even at 13. How do nearly four decades go by in an instant? Thank you for always pushing me to be my best and thank YOU for always leading the way. xoxoxo

Happy Birthday to my beautiful and dear friend Karen! On one hand, I can’t believe we so grown up and on the other, I think you were always the incredible woman that you are now… even at 13. How do nearly four decades go by in an instant? Thank you for always pushing me to be my best and thank YOU for always leading the way. xoxoxo

Good Enough
There have been so many moments in my life that I thought I had royally dropped the ball when it comes to parenting. Trying to meet the needs of my children during divorce and birthing a second child with severe cognitive, medical and physical challenges made me feel I was failing. 
“In the 1950’s Dr. Donald Winnicott found that meeting the child’s needs just 30% of the time is sufficient to create happy, well attached children. And that doing so boosts their resilience.”  Today my 17 year old son was published in Canada’s largest and most respected newspaper, The Globe and Mail for sharing his perspective. While it might seem like I am tooting his horn (or trying to say I did a good job in parenting), I am not. I am so pleased that Owen was able to voice not only his story, but the untold story of so many other siblings of children with severe special needs. They often live in the shadows of not only their brothers and sisters, but their parent’s stress.

The good news is, if parents get it right at least 30% of the time there’s a great chance that the kids will turn out okay. It’s their time to step into the light. 💫  #thekidsarealright #goodenough #KCNQ2 #kcnq2awareness #kcnq2kids #lifewithrhys #specialneedsbrothers #autism #epilepsy #lifewithrhysie #cerebralpalsy #specialneedssiblings #specialneedsfamily #specialneedsinclusive #ablism #inclusion

Good Enough
There have been so many moments in my life that I thought I had royally dropped the ball when it comes to parenting. Trying to meet the needs of my children during divorce and birthing a second child with severe cognitive, medical and physical challenges made me feel I was failing. 
“In the 1950’s Dr. Donald Winnicott found that meeting the child’s needs just 30% of the time is sufficient to create happy, well attached children. And that doing so boosts their resilience.”  Today my 17 year old son was published in Canada’s largest and most respected newspaper, The Globe and Mail for sharing his perspective. While it might seem like I am tooting his horn (or trying to say I did a good job in parenting), I am not. I am so pleased that Owen was able to voice not only his story, but the untold story of so many other siblings of children with severe special needs. They often live in the shadows of not only their brothers and sisters, but their parent’s stress.

The good news is, if parents get it right at least 30% of the time there’s a great chance that the kids will turn out okay. It’s their time to step into the light. 💫  #thekidsarealright #goodenough #KCNQ2 #kcnq2awareness #kcnq2kids #lifewithrhys #specialneedsbrothers #autism #epilepsy #lifewithrhysie #cerebralpalsy #specialneedssiblings #specialneedsfamily #specialneedsinclusive #ablism #inclusion

At 15 I could Let Go

There is a wall in my basement of toys that have accumulated over 15 years of birthdays and every one of them is a baby or toddler toy. After Rhys moved into a group home I would look at those toys and still not be able give them away. What if he comes home and plays with them? Remember how much he loved the cube?

Eventually, I sorted all the toys to their rightful place and donated them. It felt like I was giving up hope that he would learn how to use some of them one day. It also felt as though I was closing a chapter, and the door on Rhys.

My life has become so much easier since a spot opened for him in residential care. My body has started to heal, my mind has gained some clarity and I am smiling more. The guilt hasn’t subsided.

I feel guilty he’s not with me, I feel guilty I feel I’m happier or relieved. Most of all, I feel so terribly guilty that there are mothers who would give their left pinky just to hold their child once more. How on earth can I have the audacity to feel sad?

I have not allowed myself to properly grieve for two reasons. One: I don’t feel I deserve it and Two: There is no playbook on how to do it in this situation. And that’s the truth.

Today Rhys is 15 and for his birthday he received 4 new baby toys. They are back on the shelf where the old ones were. And that’s not lost on me.

#UnconditionalLove
#SpecialNeedsLove
#griefandmotherhood
#BlessedWithABeautifulChild
#StrengthInMotherhood
#SpecialNeedsPride

At 15 I could Let Go

There is a wall in my basement of toys that have accumulated over 15 years of birthdays and every one of them is a baby or toddler toy. After Rhys moved into a group home I would look at those toys and still not be able give them away. What if he comes home and plays with them? Remember how much he loved the cube?

Eventually, I sorted all the toys to their rightful place and donated them. It felt like I was giving up hope that he would learn how to use some of them one day. It also felt as though I was closing a chapter, and the door on Rhys.

My life has become so much easier since a spot opened for him in residential care. My body has started to heal, my mind has gained some clarity and I am smiling more. The guilt hasn’t subsided.

I feel guilty he’s not with me, I feel guilty I feel I’m happier or relieved. Most of all, I feel so terribly guilty that there are mothers who would give their left pinky just to hold their child once more. How on earth can I have the audacity to feel sad?

I have not allowed myself to properly grieve for two reasons. One: I don’t feel I deserve it and Two: There is no playbook on how to do it in this situation. And that’s the truth.

Today Rhys is 15 and for his birthday he received 4 new baby toys. They are back on the shelf where the old ones were. And that’s not lost on me.

#UnconditionalLove
#SpecialNeedsLove
#griefandmotherhood
#BlessedWithABeautifulChild
#StrengthInMotherhood
#SpecialNeedsPride

Are you lonely? Or, are you just alone?☁️
The mornings are dark and cold, and it can be super hard to leave your warm bed. But a fresh snowfall can become a place of inspiration, a place where your best ideas come to light.
✨ Being up early and outside is where I focus on what I can do next to help me reach my goals. I’m currently collaborating on a book, sharing insights from recent struggles and newfound tools for change.
✨ The first tool? It’s the seeing the sun of a new day. Each morning you wake, there’s the promise that today might just be better than yesterday.
Being alone doesn’t have to mean you are lonely, I promise.

#AloneWithThoughts
#MorningExploration
#SoloAdventures
#QuietJoys
#EmbraceSolitude
#CoAuthorAdventures
#MorningPagesAndWalks
#CollaborativeWriting
#MorningInspiration
#WritingJourneys
#AuthorsCommunity

Are you lonely? Or, are you just alone?☁️
The mornings are dark and cold, and it can be super hard to leave your warm bed. But a fresh snowfall can become a place of inspiration, a place where your best ideas come to light.
✨ Being up early and outside is where I focus on what I can do next to help me reach my goals. I’m currently collaborating on a book, sharing insights from recent struggles and newfound tools for change.
✨ The first tool? It’s the seeing the sun of a new day. Each morning you wake, there’s the promise that today might just be better than yesterday.
Being alone doesn’t have to mean you are lonely, I promise.

#AloneWithThoughts
#MorningExploration
#SoloAdventures
#QuietJoys
#EmbraceSolitude
#CoAuthorAdventures
#MorningPagesAndWalks
#CollaborativeWriting
#MorningInspiration
#WritingJourneys
#AuthorsCommunity

I CAN’T STOP. 🛑
Haaaaa! I am such a joiner and SO GLAD I AM! I love being a part of women and I show up even when I am scared or feeling my worst. And you know what? I ALWAYS feel better that I did!! 😜
Not only do I feel good, I get a chance to lift others up. 🥰 So here’s your last chance to buy a ticket to MamaCon, an event for mamas who want to or are building their business. It’s in Toronto and it’s THIS FRIDAY, November 10th!  The link is in bio for 15% off - until midnight tonight.
Get off the fence, come on and join us!
Link’s in the bio!!

I CAN’T STOP. 🛑
Haaaaa! I am such a joiner and SO GLAD I AM! I love being a part of women and I show up even when I am scared or feeling my worst. And you know what? I ALWAYS feel better that I did!! 😜
Not only do I feel good, I get a chance to lift others up. 🥰 So here’s your last chance to buy a ticket to MamaCon, an event for mamas who want to or are building their business. It’s in Toronto and it’s THIS FRIDAY, November 10th!  The link is in bio for 15% off - until midnight tonight.
Get off the fence, come on and join us!
Link’s in the bio!!

Making a commitment to both me and you. 🩷 I am so excited to share that while in San Diego and at The Weekend at the Pitch Club I am going to co-author a book sharing how Hypnobreathwork has healed me through some turbulent times.
I am really excited to give back to a community that is so dear to me.
If you are a parent or sibling to a medically complex or has exceptional needs and you think this might be interesting, please send me a message and tell me what you would like me to cover in the book. 🩷🩷🩷

Making a commitment to both me and you. 🩷 I am so excited to share that while in San Diego and at The Weekend at the Pitch Club I am going to co-author a book sharing how Hypnobreathwork has healed me through some turbulent times.
I am really excited to give back to a community that is so dear to me.
If you are a parent or sibling to a medically complex or has exceptional needs and you think this might be interesting, please send me a message and tell me what you would like me to cover in the book. 🩷🩷🩷

Eeeek!! Sorry I squeeked! I’m super excited to have arrived in San Diego and am ready to see all my Pitch Club sisters!! I can’t wait to up level Mac Made Simple, MY business!

Eeeek!! Sorry I squeeked! I’m super excited to have arrived in San Diego and am ready to see all my Pitch Club sisters!! I can’t wait to up level Mac Made Simple, MY business!

157 EXTRA STEPS (well, I think)🤔
 What if you had to plan extra steps for everything you do, from getting out of bed, to measuring the rate at the speed you can put inject millilitres into your stomach?
 And if you do this for your child, what are the digital tools you use to manage it all?
Do you use Evernote? Notes? Excel? ClickUp? Note pad and pen?

157 EXTRA STEPS (well, I think)🤔
 What if you had to plan extra steps for everything you do, from getting out of bed, to measuring the rate at the speed you can put inject millilitres into your stomach?
 And if you do this for your child, what are the digital tools you use to manage it all?
Do you use Evernote? Notes? Excel? ClickUp? Note pad and pen?

📱ORGANIZED PLAYLISTS!
I’ve been a Mac Head for decades and had created 166+ playlists… each felt like a mixed tape - and a memory I can’t toss. But it was starting to feel cluttered.  ✅ So I exported them, backed ‘em up and then deleted them off my iPhone!
 Now I am FREEEEEEE! But before I did, I sorted the playlists into years and made one play list for each year. Today I flipped out 2013 (a good year for me) and could remember exactly how I felt, how great running was and it put me in a fantastic mood!  🙋🏼‍♀️For more tips grab my Mac Made Simple Guide in bio!

📱ORGANIZED PLAYLISTS!
I’ve been a Mac Head for decades and had created 166+ playlists… each felt like a mixed tape - and a memory I can’t toss. But it was starting to feel cluttered.  ✅ So I exported them, backed ‘em up and then deleted them off my iPhone!
 Now I am FREEEEEEE! But before I did, I sorted the playlists into years and made one play list for each year. Today I flipped out 2013 (a good year for me) and could remember exactly how I felt, how great running was and it put me in a fantastic mood!  🙋🏼‍♀️For more tips grab my Mac Made Simple Guide in bio!

An iOS training and honouring the anniversary of Steve Job’s passing for the last 12 years isn’t THAT weird. 🤓

My son thinks I’m weird.

If I could meet three people (now dead or alive) they would be
#1 Neil Young
#2 Morrissey
#3 Steve Jobs
One out of three ain’t bad. 🤓

#digitalorganization #stevejobs #applecarplay

An iOS training and honouring the anniversary of Steve Job’s passing for the last 12 years isn’t THAT weird. 🤓

My son thinks I’m weird.

If I could meet three people (now dead or alive) they would be
#1 Neil Young
#2 Morrissey
#3 Steve Jobs
One out of three ain’t bad. 🤓

#digitalorganization #stevejobs #applecarplay

✨ It’s OK to dream. ✨
It’s been a really long journey for me. At exactly this time last year, I wasn’t even able to apply for the Mamas + Co Mamapreneur Fund. Not because I wasn’t working on my business, but because I didn’t feel I deserved it. I was afraid to talk to people, afraid to be myself, and exactly this time last year, I had hit an all time low. My mental health wasn’t where I wanted it to be, and my outside reflected how I felt on the inside.
✨
I had hit a breaking point. In fact, if you swipe back, you can probably see it on my page. I was SO READY TO CHANGE. I started with small steps. Making my bed daily, drinking water and writing three positive things in my journal at the end of the day.

That was all I could do at the time. Slowly, but surely, I was able to add to those non-negotiables. Other good habits started to become part of my daily routine. I was able to find a doctor to help me with my torn Achilles, and I started walking again.
✨
Then I realized that life is as you see it. If you want to see it from a painful lens, then that’s what it will be. But just what if - what if you wanted to dream big?
✨
My attitude changed, as did my self worth. And then I was able to challenge myself more in my business. As a result, it grew. My relationships grew and my confidence grew.
✨
My business may not win this UNBELIEVABLE package worth $30,000 USD - but I AM allowed to envision myself up there, receiving what the Universe can deliver. I am one of 8 finalists, and this means I’ve passed the first step.
✨If you don’t dream it, how will you ever achieve it?✨

✨ It’s OK to dream. ✨
It’s been a really long journey for me. At exactly this time last year, I wasn’t even able to apply for the Mamas + Co Mamapreneur Fund. Not because I wasn’t working on my business, but because I didn’t feel I deserved it. I was afraid to talk to people, afraid to be myself, and exactly this time last year, I had hit an all time low. My mental health wasn’t where I wanted it to be, and my outside reflected how I felt on the inside.
✨
I had hit a breaking point. In fact, if you swipe back, you can probably see it on my page. I was SO READY TO CHANGE. I started with small steps. Making my bed daily, drinking water and writing three positive things in my journal at the end of the day.

That was all I could do at the time. Slowly, but surely, I was able to add to those non-negotiables. Other good habits started to become part of my daily routine. I was able to find a doctor to help me with my torn Achilles, and I started walking again.
✨
Then I realized that life is as you see it. If you want to see it from a painful lens, then that’s what it will be. But just what if - what if you wanted to dream big?
✨
My attitude changed, as did my self worth. And then I was able to challenge myself more in my business. As a result, it grew. My relationships grew and my confidence grew.
✨
My business may not win this UNBELIEVABLE package worth $30,000 USD - but I AM allowed to envision myself up there, receiving what the Universe can deliver. I am one of 8 finalists, and this means I’ve passed the first step.
✨If you don’t dream it, how will you ever achieve it?✨

Happy Birthday (maybe 50 birthdays!!) to my dear friend Leslie!! Here’s to a woman who always has time to listen - and show you the best of any situation. She may have been a little trouble maker when she was a teenager - but what a mum and wife she’s become. 🩷 I love you to bits Les!! Xoxo

Happy Birthday (maybe 50 birthdays!!) to my dear friend Leslie!! Here’s to a woman who always has time to listen - and show you the best of any situation. She may have been a little trouble maker when she was a teenager - but what a mum and wife she’s become. 🩷 I love you to bits Les!! Xoxo

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